6.28.2005

begone foul spirit

By email, Carl D. Blyth, Sr. says:
Don't forget to give up your USA citizenship while you are there.

All leftists and liberals talk big about going to Canada and other socialistic economies, while blasting the United States of America where they have the freedom to demonstrate how foolish they are, but do not have the guts to put their citizenship where there mouth is.

So I am waiting to hear that you are now a citizen of Socialist Canada, where it is a crime to openly speak ill of the Queen or her minions. You will quickly learn that you cannot get away with free speech nor liberty. That is why my family fought the British Crown with such vigor, willing to spend all, give all, and surrender even life itself, rather than live in under the thumb of some egocentric kingship.

Yes your life in Canada will be fraught with fun things like 'you do what your told, not what you want!' That's what you need a good dose of the socialistic police collaring you.

HURRAH for lessons learned at great expense to others!

BEGONE foul spirit, and Americans all over will breath a sigh of relief, as will I.
The way Carl raves about free speech and liberty, one assumes he is not Muslim, eh? Notice, too, that the current rant has changed from "you all talk about moving to Canada but don't do it" to "you all talk about moving to Canada, but you'll still be US citizens". Got no choice right now, but in three years, I will.

I just thought you minions might all need a laugh today! Thanks Carl!

27 comments:

Anonymous said...

Carl, it is no more a crime here to speak ill of the Queen than it is to speak ill of the crazy lady down the street who has thirty five cats in her kitchen.

Fact is, we do have fair speech exceptions in Canada. Incitement is one thing; hate speech is another; both are crimes as they should be. Criticism is just. As is dissent. As is disapproval. As are comedic barbs.

I wonder if our good friend Carl knows the difference between any of those?

barefoot hiker said...

...Canada, where it is a crime to openly speak ill of the Queen or her minions. You will quickly learn that you cannot get away with free speech nor liberty. That is why my family fought the British Crown with such vigor, willing to spend all, give all, and surrender even life itself, rather than live in under the thumb of some egocentric kingship.

Cripes, Laura, I didn't know they had e-mail way back in 1795... but how'd they read your blog in the future? :)


HURRAH for lessons learned at great expense to others!

Forsooth, amen, sirrah! Alas, lementably, seventeen hundred and two score or more of your countrymen and countless innocent Persians have of late the dust bitten to furnish us poor British subjects with it. God save the Queen, and keep us all from Acts most "PATRIOTic"!

allan said...

God save the Queen
We mean it maaaaaaaaaaaaan ....

barefoot hiker said...

For that matter, I'm not sure you can give up your US citizenship, even taking on another. If it were just a matter of snapping your fingers, wouldn't everyone who didn't want to get drafted during Vietnam have just done it, and never voted again?

I know it's extraordinarily difficult to lose Canadian citizenship; it verges on impossible. The only way you can legally renounce it is if you're acquiring the citizenship of another country that requires, by law, that you renounce other citizenships; you have to be living outside Canada, and you have to swear before a consular official. I don't think it can be taken away, either, unless a person lies on his or her application about a fact that would have precluded their citizenship in the first place (like you were a Nazi war criminal or something). I don't know, but I would imagine it's pretty tight in the US, too... a country as proud of its citizenship as the US must have a pretty ironclad version.

laura k said...

LOL! Or as we once said: ROFLMAO.

I knew I could count on you guys to set Carl straight.

I wonder if our good friend Carl knows the difference between any of those?

You can be sure he doesn't. This is the species that calls my dissent unpatriotic and wants us all to shut up. Cognitive dissonance, anyone?

Forsooth, amen, sirrah! Alas, lementably, seventeen hundred and two score or more of your countrymen and countless innocent Persians have of late the dust bitten to furnish us poor British subjects with it.

Oo, talk renaissance to me, baby. :)

barefoot hiker said...

God save the Queen
We mean it maaaaaaaaaaaaan ....


Cause tourists are money! :)

laura k said...

My LOL was at your earlier comments, of course, I hadn't seen the post about citizenship yet.

Yeah, I think this whole "renouncing one's citizenship" thing is a wingnut myth. Why should that surprise us, their whole lives are based on myths.

C La said...

If he needs a foul spirit to begone, then, may I suggest a stronger mouthwash?

0k, low blow. I admit it. My apologizes to all (minus one).


- So sayth C

Kyle_From_Ottawa said...

"ROFLMAO"

Obviously a sign of your un-American socialistic beliefs, this must be some sort of reference to Chairman Mao.

(In case the sarcasm was missed, yes I do know what ROFLMAO means)

laura k said...

Maybe low, but definitely funny! :)

laura k said...

Obviously a sign of your un-American socialistic beliefs, this must be some sort of reference to Chairman Mao.

I see you got the code. The Queen of Hearts commands you...

Kyle_From_Ottawa said...

I bet you didn't know that Canada was obviously a Soviet like police state. Somehow I didn't notice it, but Carl knows all, even though he probably hasn't traveled as far as the next state.

laura k said...

I bet you didn't know that Canada was obviously a Soviet like police state.

They didn't say that on the applications. Now I'm in big trouble.

Kyle_From_Ottawa said...

He probably thinks it snows here all year long as well, and that we get around by snowmobile.

Anonymous said...

It's funny - when I first came across this post earlier today, online radio was playing the Sex Pistols' God Save The Queen. What irony.

laura k said...

Get around by snowmobile, and live in igloos. Sarcastic stories about Canada always use the phrase "frozen tundra". I wonder how many Canadians have ever seen tundra.

Marnie said...

Whee! That was quite entertaining, for something so disturbing and sad. I'm going to selflessly volunteer for a little experiment:

To heck with the Queen!

Now I'll wait for the RCMP to clatter up to my door and arrest me. Be sure to read my prison blog!

laura k said...

To heck with the Queen!

Another mild-mannered Canadian. :)

Prison blog! LOL

Anonymous said...

With his ersatz archaic language, I can't help but picture him as a teacher of US history at some Southern bible college. You know, the kind where they think there's no difference between beliefs and facts.

Anonymous said...

In that case, perhaps he works in the Bush administration.

Oops, did I just write that?

Shit, now I have to worry about both the RCMP and CIA knocking at my door, now don't I?

LB: Oz Edition. Watch for it in the fall. At least there's a library there that I can work in, and the conditions are probably equal to those where I currently work, so it should all feel pretty close to home.

Anonymous said...

That is the funniest chit I have read in long time. Thanks L-Girl

ALPF

----------------------------

Last night at the exact same time "W" was "BS"ing his way through another speech live on TV our MP's were passing historic legislation. It was very funny to flip back and forth from one to the other!
Here is a Texas article on Gay-Marriage.

http://www.chron.com/cs/CDA/ssistory.mpl/world/3245435

Anonymous said...

That is a terrifically-written article which captures the ideals behind the bill better than most Canadian media has. Thanks!

barefoot hiker said...

It occurs to me that while trying to be oh-so-clever I gave "Persians" as the old name for Iraqis... when in fact it's the Iranians who used to be Persians. But then it also struck me that a fact like that probably hardly matters to a guy like Carl. No doubt Iran and Iraq are equally bombworthy.

laura k said...

Being as this is a subject currently near and dear to my heart - or at least my computer - I'll say that you were pretty much right the first time anyway. The Persian Empire was huge and at one time or another, definitely included what is now Iraq. At other times they might have been called Babylonians, Medes, Archemedes...

And yes, I'm quite sure our friend Carl wouldn't know the difference! Forsooth! Alas and alack.

barefoot hiker said...

And yes, I'm quite sure our friend Carl wouldn't know the difference! Forsooth! Alas and alack.

Yes, America just hasn't been the same since the Chinese bombed Pearl Harbor.

Kyle_From_Ottawa said...

"It occurs to me that while trying to be oh-so-clever I gave "Persians" as the old name for Iraqis... when in fact it's the Iranians who used to be Persians"

Iraq was once part of the Persian empire (as was places like Bahrain). That's why there's so many shiite Muslims in Iraq, Bahrain, and Kuwait.

Incidentally, I asked my Iranian friend what they called themselves. Apprarently they've always called themselves Iranians, Persian was a term we applied to them (since the current king at the time was part of the Persian tribe)

laura k said...

If you go far back enough, ancient peoples didn't call themselves any of these things. People identified themselves by tribe or clan or sometimes city-states.

I just learned that ancient Greeks (for example) had no concept of "Greek-ness". They were Athenians, Thracians, Spartans, etc. The empires (Persian, Babylonian, etc.) really just identified the rulers.

Not unlike present-day New Yorkers, come to think of it... :)