is this blog falling apart? am i falling apart?

I feel like I should apologize to wmtc readers. I've had a marked up-tick in readership lately, for reasons unknown, and I especially feel I should apologize to those folks.

Trust me, new readers. I used to write more. I used to write better. I used to have more interesting observations and things to say and stories I kept track of.

Now I just struggle to keep up.

That's how it feels, anyway.

Before I started graduate school, I already lived with that constant feeling of a rush of information blowing by me, barely keeping up with the news stories and social issues that I care about, not to mention friends' lives and reading for pleasure, and my minimum daily requirement of brainless down-time. You know the feeling. There's too much of everything - too much information, too many options. I always feel like I'm only skimming the surface.

I have my escapes. Baseball, movies, time with friends. Then baseball became another thing to do in front of the computer screen, another time to talk and exchange ideas. Don't get me wrong, I love our Red Sox community and our game threads. But baseball used to be a time to get away from the computer and turn off that part of my brain. No longer. If I'm on the gamethread, I don't get the relaxation and down-time. If I don't thread, I miss my friends. Last season I did some of each. It wasn't much of a solution.

Swimming is another refuge, and now at least I'm back in the pool a couple of times a week. Hiking or walking in the woods is another. Even reading a book or a long article, uninterrupted, and not for school, works. But there's not enough of any of it.

Now school has just exacerbated all of this. Too many events I can't attend, blogs I don't have time to read, organizations I don't have time to join. The constant feeling of not enough time, of not enough depth. Maybe this is why people live on Facebook and Twitter. Life reduced to headlines. For me this news-feed version of life is just not satisfying.

I can't live without this blog, but I'm not doing it justice these days.

I'm not fishing for compliments, either. If you still like wmtc, I'm grateful, if a bit mystified.

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