Often times, white people get frustrated with the state of their country. They do not like the President, or Congress, or the health care system, or the illegal status of Marijuana. Whenever they are presented with a situation that seems unreasonable to them, their first instinct is to threaten to move to Canada.
For example, if you are watching TV with white people and there is a piece on the news about that they do not agree with, they are likely to declare "ok, that's it, I'm moving to Canada."
Though they will never actually move to Canada, the act of declaring that they are willing to undertake the journey is very symbolic in white culture. It shows that their dedication to their lifestyle and beliefs are so strong, that they would consider packing up their entire lives and moving to a country that is only slightly similar to the one they live in now.
Within white culture, it is agreed upon that if Canada had better weather it would be a perfect place.
Being aware that this information can be used quite easily to gain the trust of white people. Whenever they say, "I'm moving to Canada," you must immediately respond with "I have relatives in Canada."
They will then expect you to tell them about how Canada has a perfect healthcare system, legalized everything, and no crime. Though not true, it will reassure them that they are making the right choice by saying they want to move there.
But be warned, they will reference you in future conversations and possibly call on you to settle disputes about Canadian tax rates. So use this advice only if you plan to do some basic research.
Note: Canadian white people threaten to move to Europe.
Note: Europeans are unable to threaten to move anywhere.
There are some amusing comments, too, if you can weed out the moronitude.
6 comments:
This is so true. I've met so many Americans (mostly Democrats) who really have no clue about Canada but often say they are going to move to Canada if so and so wins the next election or if the price of butter increases another nickel. Republicans...well I really can't say about them, they never seem to travel (except perhaps to resorts in Mexico).
You know you're commenting on a blog by a white person who moved from the US to Canada, right?
In 2006 alone, 11,000 Americans made the same move.
Although a lot of people do say it... many people actually do it. It's posted here as a joke.
Wow, 725 comments on that thread -- many of them from people who think the site is serious and are weighing in with their views on race.
It amazes me (although perhaps it shouldn't) how many people do not understand satire. A visit to comments on Jon Swift's excellent site will illustrate.
I was joking last provincial election night that white people in Alberta threaten to move to BC. And, in fact, some of them do.
Word of the day - moronitude
Post a Comment