8.18.2007

do i regret moving to canada? is the earth flat?

Several people have emailed to ask if I regret moving to Canada. Potential reasons include the death of our beloved dog Buster ten weeks after arriving, having to move, and my place of employment closing.

I'm so taken aback by the question, I hardly know where to begin. That is, apart from a resounding "NO".

The reasons we wanted to leave the US still exist there, and have only gotten worse, as all problems, unrepaired, will do over time. The reasons I strongly believed I'd be happier in Canada still exist. I'm happy to be here, and so grateful I had the option.

I didn't move to Canada expecting my life to be perfect and trouble-free once I got here. We've had sadness, we've had loss. We've had challenges. We've had happiness, and joy, and growth, and adventure, and love. We're living our lives. This means there's good and bad.

Buster would have died no matter where we were. I was grateful beyond measure that we pulled him through those last months in New York, so he was able to make the move with us. Would I miss him any less if I were still in the US?

I had a great job in New York. I willingly left it, I chose to leave it, knowing it would be irreplaceable in Toronto. But the New York job wouldn't have lasted forever. Nothing does. What's more, it was just a job - a way to enable more important things in my life, but not important in itself.

Most people we know who moved to Canada from other countries had to move again within the first year or two of arrival. What are the odds of finding the ideal place to live on the first go? We knew the little house by the Lake came with a risk. It was exactly the right place at the right time, and we accepted the risk. Then we had to move. Moving is dreadful, and then it's over.

We love our current house, the neighbourhood, the big, fenced-in yard. Cody is still doing well, and Tala is the light of our lives. We're working, writing, watching baseball, hanging out with friends, traveling when we can.

My life isn't perfect. Whose is? But I have inner peace. Everything else I can work with.

11 comments:

Mason said...

I so can relate to that - as I'm sure all of us who have made the move. I think it's very interesting how friends in the states equate giving up great jobs to make the move is a bad thing, a loss or something incredibly negative. It's an eye-opener to me how much influence and weight those in the US place on jobs and careers. We have the same here, but the influence and weight is on our lives first, THEN work!

Idealistic Pragmatist said...

Yeah, I think you speak for a lot of us with this post.

L-girl said...

Hey Mason and I/P, thank you for that. I'm glad you relate.

Rositta said...

I've lived here in T-Dot most of my life, my husband on the other hand is from Greece/California and he hates the weather. Admittedly when I go to either Greece or California my arthritis seems to magically disapear...funny how that works. Glad you are happy here...ciao

L-girl said...

My weather stayed about the same (and I love winter) so that was never a factor for me.

At least in Canada I can have my arthritis treated and my taxes pay for it. :)

Thank you for your good wishes.

redsock said...

the death of our beloved dog Buster ten weeks after arriving, having to move, and my place of employment closing

Because in the US, pets live forever, everyone has the perfect living situation, and companies never go out of business or lay off workers.

(Who is asking these silly questions?)

M@ said...

The most impressive part about your story is that your health has improved so much, Laura. I talked with another ex-USA who agreed that dogs are much calmer here as well. Those things are truly fascinating to hear -- and honestly it's a little scary to think things are so tense down in the USA.

But Mason, I/P, Laura, if you ever do regret coming here, you let me know so I can be part of the intervention to keep you here. I'm really happy to have all of you as fellow Canadians. (And Nick and Allan as well!)

L-girl said...

(Who is asking these silly questions?)

To be generous to them, I think they had the mistaken impression I was unhappy here. I don't know how anyone who reads this blog could think that, but...

L-girl said...

The most impressive part about your story is that your health has improved so much, Laura.

The blood pressure decrease is quite astonishing.

and honestly it's a little scary to think things are so tense down in the USA

They are if you're aware of things and care about the world at all. It's certainly possible to live in your own little bubble and think everything is just grand. As long as you have plenty of money.

Sadly, many people who are struggling have been so indoctrinated with individualism, that they blame their troubles on themselves - or are so fatalistic that they blame it on god's will or bad luck - and don't look to possible social causes.

if you ever do regret coming here, you let me know so I can be part of the intervention to keep you here.

I'd say when hell freezes over, but with climate change and all...

I'm really happy to have all of you as fellow Canadians. (And Nick and Allan as well!)

M@, thank you for that. Thanks for being part of what makes Canada Canada.

James said...

I think it's very interesting how friends in the states equate giving up great jobs to make the move is a bad thing, a loss or something incredibly negative.

Well, you know when you lose that job, you lose the health coverage that goes with it... ;)

It's certainly possible to live in your own little bubble and think everything is just grand.

It works for Bush, after all!

gito said...

I asked Juan and he said, "We would have never thought of moving to Canada if not for the backwards laws of the US, but if we had known how much nicer it is and how much nicer Canadians are etc, we would definitely have looked at Canada when house shopping and once we saw it would have certainly moved here, so yes: Definitely."
When you moved to Canada, I felt like we were moving too, I can't explain why.