I still miss Buster.
It's been eight months since we lost him, and I still miss him so much.
I don't miss the enormous effort it took to keep him alive and healthy, and away from other dogs. I'm enjoying having one easy-going, low-maintenance dog. There's no doubt that our lives are much easier now. Doesn't matter. And I have no regrets; I know we did the right thing. Doesn't matter. I still miss him.
I don't even particularly want another dog (yet). As Cody ages, it won't be fair to introduce another dog into the pack. So we may have a small window in which to make that decision, and I think we're letting it shut. I can't imagine how empty it's going to feel when Cody's gone. But still, I think we're enjoying the easy life too much to make any changes.
So it isn't that I miss having two dogs. I just miss Buster.
I miss his fierce love, his intensity, his constancy. Cody loves us in her sweet, quiet, low-key way. Buster loved us like the whole universe was at stake.
17 comments:
I hadn't met you then. Had to go back and read.
It's always sad, at least for me, to lose a pet; even when I know I'm doing the right thing. Of course you miss him.
He was our third dog that we had to put down (over many years) and it doesn't get any easier. You know, we don't have kids. Our dogs have a very central place in our lives.
And beyond that, Buster was just a really special guy.
I didn't realize we didn't know each other then! It seems like longer. :)
oh, that's great. get me all teary-eyed the minute i come to work.
get me all teary-eyed the minute i come to work.
sorry :<(
I think I started my blog in 9-05 and didn't join the other one until later.
Once I did that, I started meeting more people.
And yes, I remember our first meeting and it does seem longer.
Its hard to lose a pet. Some people think they are simply that, pets, but to a lot of us, they are extensions of our family.
My dog Honey, got old and ran away to die. We knew she had done that because she didn't come back plus she was a wolf hybrid, thats what they do. They leave to do it alone. Her son, my parents dog, also named Cody, got so depressed, my parents and I felt the humane thing to do, was put him to sleep. It was THE hardest thing we have ever had to do as a family. He was a healthy young dog, but he would hardly eat, wouldnt leave the porch and cried all the time. We just couldn't see him in so much pain.
I feel for you andits perfectly ok to miss him, even if you know it was the right thing to do :-(
Know that Buster will ALWAYS be there with you :-), I know Honey is, she watches over our daughter, she like Buster, was MORE than just a dog :-D
Wow. They put down a healthy dog because he was depressed? That's amazing.
We actually adopted Cody for company for a dog who was depressed after losing her dog-sister. As I mentioned above, we've been through this three times.
they are extensions of our family.
Our dogs are our family. We make no distinction.
Know that Buster will ALWAYS be there with you
Well, thanks for your thoughts, but I don't see it that way. Buster is gone. Like all living creatures, when he died, he ended. His body went back to earth, and that's all there is. That's how I see the world.
It will be the same when I die. I won't be watching over anyone or frolicking around on a rainbow bridge. We're all just animals, here for our very brief times on earth, and then gone.
I'm sorry if that offends you. Reading that kind of sentiment on someone else's blog is one thing, but I let it go unchallenged in my own home.
I am getting teary eyed too. They are part of the family. Well, with me and roommates, Noah is the focal point of the household.
Thanks for sharing. They enrich our lives so much.
Thanks, David.
Well, with me and roommates, Noah is the focal point of the household.
Yup, we're the same way. Our lives revolved around Buster. It's been that way with all our dogs. B just took it to a whole new level. :-)
Wow, it's been that long? I still think about my dog I had as a kid(had her from when I was 8-22). She lived a long great life, but the loss never left me... they have such a huge impact on our lives.
It will be the same when I die. I won't be watching over anyone or frolicking around on a rainbow bridge. We're all just animals, here for our very brief times on earth, and then gone.
I hear ya.
I still think about my dog I had as a kid(had her from when I was 8-22). She lived a long great life, but the loss never left me...
Thank you, Stacie. I find that very comforting - especially because you've had so many animals in your life.
From age 8 to 22? That is a long relationship! I'm glad she lived to be old. :)
Lori still misses Tigger fiercly. It's been almost a year.
Lori still misses Tigger fiercly. It's been almost a year.
I remember it was shortly before we met you guys in person for the first time. Poor Lori.
I guess it does no good to say "it's been this long, why do I feel this way..." We just feel what we feel.
There's no time line on grief no matter who you've lost (or even what: I'm reflecting on friends who had a housefire...).
It seems to me that the feeling of grief goes from Great Rift Valley sized and all encompassing to Grand Canyon to North Saskatchewan sized and managable one bucket load at a time. Sometimes the buckets are dump trucks and sometimes only little kid's sandbox buckets.
But, I choose the images of really beautiful geographic locations purposefully because I really believe that people learn so much about living and loving people from having lost loved ones (and sometimes even things or intangibles like "home" or "belonging").
The processes learning to cope and incorporating loss into one's life can be so meaningful, although the initial pain can really obscure the opportunities that are there if you choose to look for them when you are ready.
I really appreciate your blogs because you have a sense of self reflection and honesty.
Cheers, Jen
Thanks, Jen. You're very kind.
I do think there's a lot to be learned from grief and mourning. I just wish there wasn't so damn much of it in life. :)
Yes, theyput him down because he stopped eating, wouldnt leave the porch and he hated other dogs. He had only ever known his mother. It was the humane thing to do.
As far as the sentiment, I am sorryif you were the one who took offense. I was just raised to show caring when I could. If thatoffended you I apologize.
Lady Celtic Fire:
You didn't offend me at all. I'm sorry if I seemed like I was offended! I was definitely not.
I meant only to state my own point of view. As an atheist, and an existentialist, I like to put forth my view that our lives are finite, not immortal. It's a minority point of view, and I like to take the opportunity on my own blog to put it out there.
Your own view is yours to choose and it doesn't offend me. Nor, I hope, does mine offend you.
I was not questioning your family's decision about ending your dog's life. I would never do that. I should have made that clearer. I know from personal experience how difficult a decision is. Whatever a loving owner decides is the right thing to do.
You haven't read wmtc for very long, so you don't know me and my style of writing. Perhaps the misunderstanding comes from that. Or perhaps not. In any case, I wasn't offended by anything you said, and I do apologize if it came off that way.
Celtic Fire:
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