8.10.2005

kyle couch writes to redsock

Whoa, Kyle Couch may not be as dumb as we thought. He's apparently been spying on us, and knows how Redsock spends most of his time. Check out this email Mr Couch sent to Allan this evening. Subject line: "asshole".
yeah I know your type. You root for the red sox while living in NYC so it gets you a little extra attention. you are in need of therapy.
I can tell that you have been asleep and drunk for most of your existence.

You need rehab as well. The next time you resort to name calling just come on down to Texas and look me up. I will be glad to kick your canadian loving ass all the way back to the border.

your daddy
Kyle
Kyle Couch, you are cordially invited to southern Ontario. You may kick our collective asses anytime after August 31. Watch out, though, one of our dogs may kick back.

We haven't had this much fun at wmtc since the days of Big Soccer!

17 comments:

David Cho said...

Laura, you seem to really enjoy hate mail. I do too and I doubt yours can top mine.

That is some hillarious stuff from Kyle.

Crabbi said...

It's so creepy that he thinks he's your daddy. I bet he says that to all the guys, though.

I have to admit - "asshole" is a really great subject line. Just pulls you right in. I bet when you saw that, you knew you were in for some thoughtful correspondence,

Crabbi said...

One more thing - bet Kyle would enjoy the America Supports Your Freedom Walk and 9/11 concert. I hope Toby Keith performs. Such a golden-throated warbler! And those lyrics - my god, such richness, such complexity. The multiple layers of "We'll put a boot in your ass. It's the American way." I'm going to be trying to figure that one out for the rest of my life. Oh, and I did I mention he's hot? Mmm...

G said...

I can top that.

I had mentioned jokingly (in comments on another site), referencing a guy who was insulting a pro-Canadian, that if he said something up here to that effect he'd get smacked with about 20 hockey sticks. You know, the old Canadians and their hockey sticks joke. Guy responded by leaving a comment on my site here which linked to a picture of a gun. He figured it was a better joke, but the message written beside it ("better than 20 hockey sticks") was decidedly a bit more threatening than anything I'd said.

Interestingly enough, that link is no longer active. Guess I'm not the only one who felt the guy was a bit too strong in his reaction ... hmm.

deang said...

And, as you know, in the US the more likely you are to use a gun on somebody, the more "conservative" you're said to be.

Niko said...

The next time you resort to name calling just come on down to Texas and look me up.

Texas...doesn't that sum it all up right there? I heard Bill Mahar make a great joke the other night about Texas. They are the only state to have been an independent country...perhaps we should just let them be one again

L-girl said...

Laura, you seem to really enjoy hate mail.

Oh yeah, I love it!

When Redsock was a music critic, the first time there was a letter in a magazine calling him a jerk and a fool, we were whooping and high-fiving. He had arrived.

Those letters from your student are too much!

Guy responded by leaving a comment on my site here which linked to a picture of a gun.

Whoa. That is seriously fucked up. And so American. (Yes, often a redundancy.)

Anonymous said...

I love recieving hate mail as well, it feels great to know you can piss someone off enough that they take the time to write!

Talkin about hockey sticks as weapons, you forgot about the famous Canadian weapon.... the beaver! Check out the video!

http://www.peterk.ca/beaver1.wmv

and the less beaver oriented conclusion, but still funny:

http://www.peterk.ca/beaver2.mov

And yes, these are work safe, we aren't talking about that kinda beaver! :D

Too bad it takes a beer company to spread Canadian patriatism, but I guess that is what makes us Canadian.

Peter

RobfromAlberta said...

Guy responded by leaving a comment on my site here which linked to a picture of a gun.

Not just any old Smith and Wesson .38 either, it was an AK-47, probably Chinese and he thoughtfully included a box of ammo in the pic to let us know he was ready for anything.

L-girl said...

I love recieving hate mail as well, it feels great to know you can piss someone off enough that they take the time to write!

Yes, that's it exactly. Which goes to show you, when someone really gets your goat, the best thing to do is ignore them. It will drive them nuts.

Peter, the video is great. But the 2nd one won't load. Is the URL correct?

Even though I'm working at home, I did wonder about that beaver reference...

L-girl said...

Not just any old Smith and Wesson .38 either, it was an AK-47, probably Chinese and he thoughtfully included a box of ammo in the pic to let us know he was ready for anything.

Geez. Positively creepy.

Anonymous said...

L-Girl,

The URL is right, but it is quicktime so it won't run if you don't have it on your computer.

Peter

teflonjedi said...

You will appreciate this...he wrote me me as well.

Kyle wrote:
----------------
Subject: more thought

Hey Spacenut, as you suggested I've given it more thought. My conclusion is that I'm not just repeating that this country is great. I am stating a fact. This Country believes in individualism. This is the place where you can achieve whatever goals you set for yourself w/ hard work and tenacity. Unlike the socialist gov't you prefer, where we all have to Shaaaare. To hell w/ that. I work for my family and I pay for my family. I expect no handouts. Once again unlike you and your socialist tendencies.

In exile? I can't blame them for kicking you out. I would too. IN all seriousness you can't be serious. You leave a hell hole and move to paradise and you are in exile? I've been to canada and it truly sucks. by the way your mounties suck too . I know how dearly you snowbunnies hold that institution.
-------------

I did write back, this is what I wrote:

-------------
Not sure where you've been, but I can say that I have lived in many
places in Canada, and visited many more, and there's no place in
Canada I thought of as a hell-hole....certainly no place I worried
about my safety walking down the streets. Sad to say, it's not the
same here.

Also, the last I checked, Canada is a democracy, not a socialist
republic. You're confusing Canada with China, or the late USSR.

But, since you're not into sharing, if you don't mind, I paid taxes
last year, and therefore the road in front of your home is my
property. Please do not tresspass. I realize that this means you
will have to stay in your home, but do not worry, I believe with your
hard work and tenacity, you will be able to succeed handily without
being able to interact with others.

Good luck!
------------

Perhaps I'm just encouraging him...

dean1 said...

Great comeback, Teflonjedi!

And Niko, I've got a good Texas joke, too. Heard it from a friend recently: "I wouldn't mind an asteroid the size of Texas hitting the planet, as long as it actually hits Texas."

L-girl said...

The URL is right, but it is quicktime so it won't run if you don't have it on your computer.

That explains it. I have Quicktime but it behaves strangely and often doesn't run. I did like the 1st video, though.

I have to remember to call "Molson" (as we say here) "Canadian". That's much more important than the spelling of center or centre.

"I wouldn't mind an asteroid the size of Texas hitting the planet, as long as it actually hits Texas."

Love it. Hi Dean1, welcome to wmtc! Or are you DeanG?

deang said...

Sorry. It should've been deang. Typo.

L-girl said...

No problem. Welcome again. :)