I hope this doesn't offend anyone who is no rush to see me go. It's not that I want to get away from anyone. If you'll miss me, you can be sure I will miss you, too.
But I am ready. I am emotionally, mentally, psychologically ready to make the move. Our recent trip to look at apartments further gelled this state of mind.
I feel myself emotionally detaching from life here. I don't feel my usual fervor to work for change. Maybe this is partly a lingering post-election hangover of extreme disappointment. But much of it is a wish to no longer be part of this system. The war in Iraq, the war on women, on gay people, on children, on diversity, on personal freedom, the zeal to privatize and commercialize absofuckinglutely everything... It's like a huge mudslide, and our efforts to fix this legislation here or that cabinet appointment there is like tackling the mudslide with a spoon.
Not that we can or should do otherwise. Any spoonful saved is a victory.
But I have no energy for it now. I barely look at the emails from MoveOn and ACT. There are no emails from the Democrats because I took myself off their list. That all feels like my past now, and I stand facing a different future.